Ep.5 This is 3rdPersonPerspective/Vada of Disputants
When disputes arise, stepping into the 3rd person perspective turns arguments into opportunities for growth. This episode explores the ancient practice of vāda—dialogue not for victory, but for truth.
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Conflict has always been part of human interaction. From everyday disagreements to large-scale debates, people naturally see the world through different lenses. Yet when disputes arise, what often gets lost is the ability to step back and observe the conversation from a broader view. This episode explores the practice of seeing conflicts through the 3rd person perspective, a mindset rooted in the ancient idea of vāda—the dialogue of disputants.
In this approach, the goal is not simply to decide who is right or wrong, but to understand the dynamics between opposing sides. Instead of standing firmly in one camp, the 3rd person perspective observes the arguments as if from outside the circle. It recognizes the strengths and weaknesses of both positions and values dialogue over domination.
As Aristotle once remarked, “It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.” This wisdom reminds listeners that engaging with different perspectives does not require abandoning one’s own beliefs—it requires patience, curiosity, and the courage to listen.
History offers many examples where disputes led to growth when handled with dialogue. The Indian philosophical tradition of vāda placed high importance on respectful debate, where disputants sought not just victory but truth. Similarly, Voltaire is often attributed with the phrase, “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.” Whether entirely his words or not, the sentiment underscores the power of respecting differing views while holding space for one’s own.
The 3rd person perspective also helps prevent conflicts from turning personal. By stepping outside the immediate emotions of an argument, individuals are able to see the bigger picture. As Marcus Aurelius wrote in his Meditations: “Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” Through this lens, arguments are less about winning and more about learning.
In the end, this episode suggests that disputes are not simply obstacles but opportunities. By practicing the vāda of disputants and adopting the 3rd person perspective, people can transform conflicts into bridges—leading not only to resolution but also to greater understanding of themselves and others.
